Why You’ll Never Stick to Your Goals... Until You Hear This

Why You Don’t Follow Through (and How to Change That)

If you’ve ever felt frustrated that you can’t seem to stick with your workout routine or New Year’s resolution—you're not alone. Melissa Gray, LCSW, owner of Kindle Counseling in Fulshear, joined Busy People Getting Fit to explain why we fall off track and how to change it.

The problem often isn’t willpower—it’s structure, priorities, and mindset. “Sometimes,” Melissa says, “just getting started is a workout in mental fitness.”

Set Priorities Before Setting Goals

Before trying to add another habit to your plate, Melissa recommends clarifying your true priorities. That means asking: Is fitness really important to me right now? If it is, it deserves space in your calendar, not just your mind.

She recommends tools like:

• Fixed Commitment Calendar – schedule around your immovable obligations.

• Time Audit – track how you actually spend time (spoiler: social media may be taking more than you think).

• Public Calendar Sharing – make your workout time visible so others respect your boundaries.

SMART Goals? Or Something Better?

While SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) work for many, Melissa suggests exploring other methods, especially if you’ve tried SMART goals and still struggle.

She shared two powerful alternatives:

• Motivational Interviewing: Start with why you want to change. Is it about your health, your confidence, or setting an example for your kids?

• WOOP Framework:

  • Wish – What do you want?

  • Outcome – What would success look like?

  • Obstacle – What could get in the way?

  • Plan – What’s your backup plan when that obstacle shows up?

And for Blue Eagle clients, Bryan asks: What’s your floor? Meaning: what’s the bare minimum you’ll commit to even when life gets hard?

Structure Beats Willpower

“Willpower is overrated,” Bryan said, “but structure works.” Melissa agreed. Routines reduce decision fatigue and make it easier to follow through.

Here’s how to build structure that works:

• Prepare your gear the night before

• Stack new habits onto old ones (like doing leg lifts while brushing your teeth)

• Start with ridiculously small steps (like just putting on your gym socks)

• Rename “exercise” into something fun—like “Operation Bangin’ Booty” or “Big Guns Gary”

These may sound silly, but they reduce resistance—and help make fitness fun instead of a chore.

The Real Secret: Mental Fitness

Melissa emphasized that we often need to “retrain” our brain. If you’re always making excuses, or stuck in all-or-nothing thinking, you’re reinforcing a pattern. But by recognizing that pattern and flipping your self-talk, you can rewire your mindset to be more positive, consistent, and confident.

“Even little setbacks are still forward motion,” Melissa shared. “They show you what doesn’t work—so you can find what does.”

Start Here: One Step to Take Today

Feeling overwhelmed? Start with this:

Recognize that mental fitness is part of physical fitness.

Then—just take one step. It could be preparing your gym bag, writing down your why, or going for a 5-minute walk. Just move forward.

Want Help Building Routines That Stick?

Melissa offers free worksheets and tools for mental fitness, time management, and goal setting.

👉 Visit KindleCounseling.com and fill out the contact form to request resources or book a complimentary 15-minute consultation.